Monday, November 29, 2004
Human Behavior
Tonight I concluded my tour of the northeastern metropoli, and now I actually get to stay at home for a whopping three and a half weeks. Over the past month or so I have been awed and inspired by the vast intellectual superiority of the residents of these most blue parts our our great Nation. Clearly northeasterners have earned the right to mock southerners for their supposed stupidity and irrational behavior.
Or not.
You see, it really doesn't matter if you live north or south of the Mason-Dixon line, there are plenty of complete idiots in both regions of the country. This is exemplified no more plainly than by driving through the northeast. First of all, it is apparent to me through several trips that no one in the blue state of Pennsylvania is capable of driving a car. Unfortunately, the inability to operate a motor vehicle is not confined to just Pennsylvanians. Shortly after leaving the District of Columbia on Wednesday afternoon to head home for Thanksgiving we experienced a traffic jam that lasted until, oh, Canal Street in New York. The traffic jam seemed to have been exacerbated by the rain that was falling. You see, people lose the ability to drive when rain falls from the sky, (and in the DC area, anything else for that matter. Have you seen what happens to this city when it snows?), and as such traffic just stops.
There was a brief respite from the traffic. Instead of hopping on the Turnpike after the Delaware Bridge, we decided to take I-295, which runs parallel to the Turnpike (and is toll free). Despite the fact that there are signs everywhere to do this, very few people ever choose to take this much, much, much faster alternate route because, you know, that constitutes doing something different that what is usually done. Well, good for the rest of us, because it represents a break in the awful traffic we experience for 225 miles.
I was also struck tonight by the human inability to call audibles, as it were. After exiting Amtrak at Union Station at about 12:30 in the evening, Metro was no longer an option. As I suspected there might be there was a huuuuuuuuge line for taxis. Now, it seems there are three options at a time like this. A)Wait in line for half an hour or so for a cab. B)Walk a block or two and, in all liklihood, catch a cab on Massaschusetts Avenue, or C)Walk accross the street and catch one of those livery cabs and pay an extra buck or two. Hmmmm, now, we can all make different decisions and they are all perhaps equally legitimate, but only one of the above mentioned options has you home later than one in the morning. Just saying is all.
Yes it is 1:18 in the morning and perhaps I am a little cranky, but sometimes humans seem just so goshdarned funny to me.
Or not.
You see, it really doesn't matter if you live north or south of the Mason-Dixon line, there are plenty of complete idiots in both regions of the country. This is exemplified no more plainly than by driving through the northeast. First of all, it is apparent to me through several trips that no one in the blue state of Pennsylvania is capable of driving a car. Unfortunately, the inability to operate a motor vehicle is not confined to just Pennsylvanians. Shortly after leaving the District of Columbia on Wednesday afternoon to head home for Thanksgiving we experienced a traffic jam that lasted until, oh, Canal Street in New York. The traffic jam seemed to have been exacerbated by the rain that was falling. You see, people lose the ability to drive when rain falls from the sky, (and in the DC area, anything else for that matter. Have you seen what happens to this city when it snows?), and as such traffic just stops.
There was a brief respite from the traffic. Instead of hopping on the Turnpike after the Delaware Bridge, we decided to take I-295, which runs parallel to the Turnpike (and is toll free). Despite the fact that there are signs everywhere to do this, very few people ever choose to take this much, much, much faster alternate route because, you know, that constitutes doing something different that what is usually done. Well, good for the rest of us, because it represents a break in the awful traffic we experience for 225 miles.
I was also struck tonight by the human inability to call audibles, as it were. After exiting Amtrak at Union Station at about 12:30 in the evening, Metro was no longer an option. As I suspected there might be there was a huuuuuuuuge line for taxis. Now, it seems there are three options at a time like this. A)Wait in line for half an hour or so for a cab. B)Walk a block or two and, in all liklihood, catch a cab on Massaschusetts Avenue, or C)Walk accross the street and catch one of those livery cabs and pay an extra buck or two. Hmmmm, now, we can all make different decisions and they are all perhaps equally legitimate, but only one of the above mentioned options has you home later than one in the morning. Just saying is all.
Yes it is 1:18 in the morning and perhaps I am a little cranky, but sometimes humans seem just so goshdarned funny to me.
# posted by Paul Zummo : 1:18 AM
